I slept with my phone in my bed. :) That's how excited I was to get a call back from Jenny this morning. As my previous post said I called after hours yesterday and left a message to the promise of a call back first thing. I didn't get a call back first thing, but I didn't give them much of a chance. My daughters father dropped my little girl off just after seven this morning (though we are together we don't live together so we alternate nights with her, each taking four nights before switching) and I waited as long as I could before calling. When I did I reached someone who was extremely nice and helped me to set up an appointment in the evening. I couldn't wait!
So once home from our morning errands, my daily doctors appointment and my daily trip to Dunkin Doughnuts, Lenna and I got in bed for a nap. She was not ready to be up yet and I was more than willing to have any excuse to just lay in bed and hold my sleeping daughter. But my mind was elsewhere. I kept waiting for that call back! And as I mentioned, I finally got tired of waiting and made the call. Once the call was made, appointment scheduled, I was able to relax a little bit and fall asleep with my daughter. Once awake we played with my grandmother and I made her lunch and waited for my mother to try to get home as early as she could. Not just for the appointment but because she hadn't seen Lenna in four nights!
My mother made it home just before our appointment and we packed a small diaper bag for Lenna and headed to the Centre. I'm lucky in that my local center is less than a five minute drive from our home. In fact if the one light on the way is green, I think it takes less than three minutes. We arrived and as soon as we walked in the door the woman behind the desk greeted us, though her eyes quickly shot to my daughter and she beamed with an obvious adoration for children. Here is where I'm taking a small breath of relief. Anyone with small children knows they can be a handful in any public situation.
I told the woman I was there to see Chris and she said that she was in fact Chris. She led me to a small room and offered to bring in a chair for my mother and even pointed her and my daughter in the direction of the fairly large area full of children toys and furniture. When she came in to start the consultation she asked if we wanted to shut the door and I told her that was up to her and depended on how annoyed she was going to be by Lenna. You see, Lenna had not gotten her full nap in, she had been interrupted by her great grandmother. So now, at quarter of six in the evening, she was over tired and now over stimulated in a new environment with twisting hallways that were just too tempting not to run in. Chris however just laughed and said she had a six year old daughter was not in the slightest bothered by Lenna. She said they had kids in the Centre all the time. This woman was not only incredibly nice, but made me feel completely at ease with having my daughter there in all her 16 month old hyper active glory. I was already very happy with my decision to be there.
Chris began the consultation by asking me why I had chosen Jenny. I told her I had been on Weight Watchers more times than I could remember as well as trying Atkins, the cabbage soup diet, South Beach, the Beyonce Diet / Lemonade Cleanse, liquid diet, Apple Cider Vinegar diet, etc., etc., etc.. I told her that in the beginning of a diet I couldn't trust myself with portion control and didn't have much interest or time for planning out meals. Chris said that it was sounding like Jenny was going to work for me. She handed me a pamphlet with pictures of the meals and snacks and what have you for me to look over while she asked me what my goals were, long term and short term.
I actually hadn't thought about this before hand but what I told her came out truthfully and easy without much thought. Its been so long since I've been anywhere near a healthy weight or size, that I had no concept of what is healthy for me. No idea whats normal for me. I didn't even have any idea what my weight was so I couldn't even tell her numbers! She asked when it was that I knew my weight last and I told her that just before I had my daughter at my last check up before being induced I had been weighed in. I don't remember that number exactly today but I do know it was somewhere just above 340. I knew that I had lost weight after having my daughter but just in the last two weeks had gained in back. Clothes I bought a month ago, weren't fitting this week. So when we walked back to get on the scale I was truly expecting to be at least in the 330s or back in or above the 340s. Now Id been told time and again even when I did for sure that weight that much that I never looked like I weighed that much. Part of that comes from being 5'8" (though if you ask anyone at my Centre I'm 5'7"!). Another part of that comes from always hiding weight well. I've never looked exactly how much I've weighed. Unfortunately I've never weighed a small enough number for that too work in my advantage.
Anyway I stepped on the scale and was shocked when it stopped at 305 point something or other. I was so shocked by the 305 that I didn't even care what the point whatever said. I would have been thrilled for it to pop up anything less than 330. Anything 330 - 340 I would have expected. Anything 340 - 350 wouldn't have shocked me but would have upset me. Anything above 350 would have hurt, crippled me, left me on the floor in tears. So needless to say (but I will again!) I was thrilled to see 305! Now when I think back to high school and remember breaking 200 and how incredibly upset I was, 305 doesn't thrill me. But when I realistically think about where I've been in my health the last few years, I'm quite happy to be starting at 305.
I must have had a funny look on my face because Chris looked concerned and I told her that number was not anywhere near what I had been expecting.
"Its better?" She asked.
"Much better."
I couldn't help smiling.
Back in our little room - which Chris said and displayed by her lack of know where was not her office - we talked short term goals first. I asked her what her recommendation was, as again, its been so long since I've been anywhere near healthy or involved in weight loss, I didn't know what was fair to ask of myself. I told her that I wanted to have a realistic goal, but also wanted to push myself. We decided on a short term goal of 25 - 30 pounds in the first twelve weeks. Then she asked about long term goals.
What was my ultimate goal?
How did I picture myself at success?
Was it a weight?
A particular dress size?
Again I had to tell her I hadn't the faintest idea. I didn't even know what was considered healthy for my height. Chris punched in a few numbers and came back with a ideal weight of 160. She warned me of course that the computers don't take into consideration bone mass and what have you and that I could very well end up perfectly content at 180. I however do remember being 180 in my teens and being it wearing quite heavy on my frame. I can foresee needing to be less than 160 but for a long term goal to be adjusted later if necessary, we settled on 160.
Next, we had to pick a program. This is where I let Chris focus more on my mother who is blessing me with the gift of Jenny. It was up to her what she wanted to pay for. We ended up deciding on the one year plan until we realized my step father had my mothers credit card. So we settled on the 12 week "gut check" Jenny Set Go program. $30 plus the cost of food and after this expires we will purchase the year program. Here now, Chris calculated my caloric intake level (to change later) and came back with 1700 calories daily explaining that this would, of course, fall as the weight did. She handed me a menu and though I didn't understand at first I did come to realize it was not a sample menu but would be the menu I would follow for the week.
Unfortunately I only scanned it and didn't realize until putting the food away at home later that there are two meals on this menu that I just cannot see myself eating. One being the tuna salad as it is prepared and the tuna salad is already mixed. Now obviously being a Jenny meal its not going to be full of mayonnaise. I HATE mayonnaise with a passion I cannot convey. I am willing to taste this food however I really don't know if I'll be able to stomach it. The other meal I will not eat, the cheese omelet. Years ago I got awful food poisoning from an omelet and haven't even been able to smell them since without getting sick. I'm not quite sure what I'm going to do in place of these meals. I'm going to call the Centre tomorrow and see what my options are.
Other than those two meals everything else seems very doable, some of the meals are looking quite good actually! Chris filled up a few bags for us after handing me a few more pamphlet's and booklets. She told me that my consultant would be Shannon who was also young like me and had lost 80 pounds on the program. I'm really looking forward to meeting her next week!
I'd like to tell you that I left and went home and ate a salad in preparation for the week to come but that is NOT the case. My mother and I dropped my daughter off to my step father because she needed that nap and hit the local diner known for its cherry cokes full of cherry's and syrup and incredible chocolate cheesecake! And I am not sorry! I ordered chicken slovaki with french fries and Greek salad and mozzarella sticks for an appetizer, something I don't even do when I'm not dieting but I figured what the hell!
Now here it is one am. My daughter is asleep in her crib, my Jenny food in the freezer waiting and I am pretty excited to get started. I'm also a little nervous of course, that its going to be not enough food or too much food. The latter not the typical fear you would think I might have but the food on the menu is a lot more than I am used to eating. Its just much healthier than I'm used to eating. Chris told me a lot of people have trouble adjusting to it and that I should do my best to eat it but not force myself.
And so that is the plan.
Tomorrow Lenna and I will go to my daily doctors appointment and then hit the grocery store so I can stock up on some veggies and fruits and Crystal Light and what have you. I'm hoping its not too hot tomorrow to take a long walk or three with the baby and her heavy stroller and get some movement going. I'm planning on and looking forward to starting to do my Zumba DVDs again.
At one point I was doing my Zumba DVD, (the hour long Zumba Fitness Concert DVD - a non stop hour of Zumba) a minimum of once a day, typically first thing in the morning and before bed. I loved my Zumba DVD and tried a few months ago to start doing it again but I couldn't even get through the first three songs. I couldn't believe I'd once been doing the entire hour long non stop routine twice a day without problem. I'm going to work up to that DVD again and try using the Biggest Loser DVDs I bought and think I previewed once but never used. My mother and I also used to belong to the local gym until she lost her credit card and never got the new number to the gym so we couldn't be charged monthly but at that point weren't going anyway. I'm hopefully going to get up there tomorrow to join.
No, not hopefully. I'm GOING to. I need to because when my daughter is at her fathers house for those four nights I literally don't know what to do with myself and have spent days sleeping without her. I cannot stand it when she's gone and I don't see her. The last few months even on the nights she spent at his house, I'd have her all day while she was at work, but he's just finished his work on that house. So now, this not seeing her all day is so new and so incredibly hard for me. I get very depressed when she's not here and if I have the option of going to the gym I can distract myself with that. That is a must on my to do list!
Another must - get some sleep! Its one a.m. and time to power down this blog, plus Lenna is now fussing for me. But let me be honest here, I'm going to sooth my daughter and then finish off that ice cream that's in the freezer! Root beer float here I come!
Goodnight
Dream Sweet!
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